Come, Flounder With Us

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Since then my experience as a church member, or as a father and a husband, has been much the same. Never an unmixed success. Never a performance that I could feel I hadn’t unnecessarily tainted with sins of commission and omission. I am a shabby Mormon. These failures are better than successes elsewhere. I have found more joy making a hash of things in the gospel path than would be possible on any other path pursued however flawlessly. I mean that. 

“Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.”
C.S. Lewis, in Screwtape, showed us that the fear of death was harder to endure than death.
“A man’s reach should exceed his grasp or what’s a heaven for.” 

One of the themes of this blog is that failure is always an option. I would almost say that it is the only option. Come, flounder with us. ("Being a Mormon is Hard", Junior Ganymede, Nov, 4, 2013 )

My experience is the same as Junior Ganymede. I don't think highly of my experience on my mission. I attribute nearly all of my success since to my wonderful wife who has inspired, and and times, prodded me in the way I knew was healthiest for me to go.

The last paragraph above contains a point that should not be missed. I think this life is designed for us to fail. I think that is the primary test for each of us. In the infinite variety of strengths and weaknesses were are all gifted with, the greatest is the opportunity to act in relation to our failure.

Will we, like my deepest tendency is, attempt to hide until we have fully overcome our most shameful attributes? Or instead, will we forge ahead and decide that we cannot be what we want to be, what the Lord has said we can be, without his hand.

Like Peter faltered so do we all. It is only through the hand of the Lord and the loving word of chastisement that we both receive his grace and recognize our failings and can therefore begin our work to overcome them, hand in hand with the Lord.

We must be willing to dare greatly and be the (wo)man in the arena. Not waiting until we are bullet-proof. Letting others see us, and hopefully join with us in a heavenly quest of evolving, growing, becoming like God.

Which Part is Mine?

She was only a dairy man's daughter,
she was only a child of thirteen;
but the stars on the radio brightened her nights with a dream.
So she called up her best girlfriend Jenny
'cause she thought they would make quite a pair,
She said, "Let's you and me, try to sing harmony
at the amateur night at the fair."

But she only had the range of an alto,
so the part she knew best went to her friend.
And when Jenny's soprano drowned out the piano
they'd have to start over again.
And the dairyman's daughter would then say,

"Which part is mine?
and Jen, which part is yours?
Could you tell me one more time;
I'm never quite sure.

And I won't cross the line
like I have before.
So please help me learn which part is mine,
and which part is yours."

She grew up and got married to Bobby
kept him working on his MBA
they had two little redheaded children,
and one on the way.

Everybody said she could work wonders,
and she wondered what everyone meant.
She played so many roles, it was taking its toll
and she feared that her time was misspent.

So she opened her heart to her husband.
They discussed everything on her list.
from the kids, to the job,
to her feelings for her Bob.
But what it really boiled down to was this: She said:

"Which part is mine?
and Bob, which part is yours?
Let's review it one more time;
I guess I"m not sure.

And I won't cross the line
like I have before
if we just define which part is mine,
and which part is yours."

Every sleepless night knows many mothers
who are wond'ring if they've done alright.
And the dairyman's daughter knew
more than a few of those nights.

Had she given her son too much freedom?
Had she smothered her two teenage girls?
Did she spoil them too much or not trust them enough
to prepare them for life in this world?

So she opened her heart to the heavens
and she spoke of her children by name.
And the prayer that she prayed
that her kids would be saved had a very familiar refrain.

Which part is mine?
And God, which part is yours?
Could you tell me one more time,
I'm never quite sure.

And I won't cross the line
like I have before.
But it gets so confusing some times.
Should I do more, or trust the divine?
Please, just help me define which part's mine,
and which part is yours.

Did you hear me?
I can feel you near me.
It is the answer
that I've been longing for;

just to know you hear me,
and to feel you near me.
It's all the answer
that I've been longing for.

Did you hear me?
I can feel you near me.
It is the answer
that I've been longing for;

just to know you hear me,
after I've done my best,
and to feel you near me.
I know you'll do the rest.
It is the answer that I've been longing for!

Come Unto Christ

Over the last 24 hours it seems like a message has been coming through.

Last night as we read as a family, "And neither at any time hath any wrought miracles until after their faith; wherefore they first believed in the Son of God." Ether 12:18

This morning as I read I came across this, "my brother has proved unto you, in many instances, that the word is in Christ unto salvation" Alma 34:6

As I drove to work this morning I saw this on a window of a car next to me.  The reverence and submission to God touched me.  It made me think of the "I am a Mormon" campaign that will be starting in my home town soon.  It made me think of what I would put on my car.  The bumper sticker I came up with was one with the words "Come unto Christ".  To me is it filled with hope, challenge and healing.

The phrase "Come unto Christ" appears 4 times in the Book of Mormon and once in the Doctrine and Covenants.  It is in this message that my hope has grown.  I am invited as Nathanael, come and see.  He pleads with me to look and live.  As I offer up my whole soul unto Him, I am changed.  I become, inch by inch, what I most want to become, a son of God.  A son by adoption, through His blood.

And now, my beloved brethren, I would that ye should come unto Christ, who is the Holy One of Israel, and partake of his salvation, and the power of his redemption. Yea, come unto him, and offer your whole souls as an offering unto him, and continue in fasting and praying, and endure to the end; and as the Lord liveth ye will be saved. (Omni 1:26)

What greater message is there?

Yearning for God

On Sunday my friend Bruce shared his testimony to our congregation.  There was a part that resonated with me. He talked about how he had left the church.  Later he had remarried.  He thought he should be happy.  Yet he felt a deep loneliness.  He described it as being because the Spirit had left him.

There have been a few times that I felt that.  I felt a yearning for God and a life God would bless.  For me these times serve as a warning.  That a life lived only for myself will ultimately be empty.  When I forget myself and serve others as I think God would, then the Holy Presence comes into my life.  Then I feel an abundance of life and love.  My Yearning has turned to Surrender.  Surrender to God and how I feel he wants me to live. Now it is only to practice those truths.  To work each day to keep the presence of the Spirit in my life and to serve the Savior of my soul.

"Sunday Morning Coming Down", Lyrics

It was this song by Johnny Cash that helped me remember that feeling I had and that I feel Bruce described.

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