My good friend Buzzz shared this recently. I don't want to forget it.
"For any relationship to succeed, five positive things need to be said to every one negative. There are NO exceptions!"
Another friend said that this particularly applies in conflict. I have also heard it described as an emotional bank account. You need to be focused on deposits and withdraw less. Not that you use it as a score board. Just thinking about what can I do to make this experience more meaningful and positive.