But If Not

I was reading the lesson I think we have in priesthood today, Words of Hope and Consolation at the Time of Death. I thought of a talk given recently in General Conference that references Daniel chapter 3.

Centuries ago, Daniel and his young associates were suddenly thrust from security into the world—a world foreign and intimidating. When Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego refused to bow down and worship a golden image set up by the king, a furious Nebuchadnezzar told them that if they would not worship as commanded, they would immediately be cast into a burning fiery furnace. “And who is that God that shall deliver you out of my hands?”

The three young men quickly and confidently responded, “If it be so [if you cast us into the furnace], our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand.” That sounds like my eighth-grade kind of faith. But then they demonstrated that they fully understood what faith is. They continued, “But if not, … we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up.” Dan. 3:18 That is a statement of true faith.

They knew that they could trust God—even if things didn’t turn out the way they hoped. They knew that faith is more than mental assent, more than an acknowledgment that God lives. Faith is total trust in Him.

Faith is believing that although we do not understand all things, He does. Faith is knowing that although our power is limited, His is not. Faith in Jesus Christ consists of complete reliance on Him.

Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego knew they could always rely on Him because they knew His plan, and they knew that He does not change. They knew, as we know, that mortality is not an accident of nature. It is a brief segment of the great plan of our loving Father in Heaven to make it possible for us, His sons and daughters, to achieve the same blessings He enjoys, if we are willing.

They knew, as we know, that in our premortal life, we were instructed by Him as to the purpose of mortality: “We will make an earth whereon these may dwell; And we will prove them herewith, to see if they will do all things whatsoever the Lord their God shall command them.”

So there we have it—it’s a test. The world is a testing place for mortal men and women. When we understand that it’s all a test, administered by our Heavenly Father, who wants us to trust in Him and to allow Him to help us, we can then see everything more clearly.

His work and His glory, He told us, is “to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.” He has already achieved godhood. Now His only objective is to help us—to enable us to return to Him and be like Him and live His kind of life eternally.

Knowing all this, it was not difficult for those three young Hebrews to make their decision. They would follow God; they would exercise faith in Him. He would deliver them, but if not—and we know the rest of the story. (Dennis E. Simmons, “But If Not …,” Ensign, May 2004, 73. Bold added by Rich)

There is another GC article that also references "But if not".

Too often we offer our prayer or perform our administration and then wait nervously to see whether our request will be granted, as though approval would provide needed evidence of His existence. That is not faith! Faith is, quite simply, a confidence in the Lord. In Mormon’s words, it is “a firm mind in every form of godliness” (Moro. 7:30; emphasis added). The three Hebrew magistrates expressed trust that the Lord would deliver them from the fiery furnace, “but if not,” they said to the king, “we [still] will not serve thy gods” (Dan. 3:18; emphasis added). Significantly, not three but four men were seen in the midst of the flames, and “the form of the fourth [was] like the Son of God” (Dan. 3:25). (Lance B. Wickman, “But If Not,” Ensign, Nov 2002, 30)

Update 2011-05-17
As I was searching for this talk I found out that Martin Luther King Jr. had given a speech on was seems like the same theme.

"Power...given by God so universally"

What power was Jeffrey R. Holland speaking of?

I submit to you that no power, priesthood or otherwise, is given by God so universally to so many with virtually no control over its use except self-control. And I submit to you that you will ever be more like God at any other time in this life than when you are expressing that particular power. (Of Souls, Symbols, and Sacraments. BYU Devotional. 12 January 1988.)

This is one of the quotes one of my favorite people has on the inside of her kitchen cabinet door.

This puts in perspective the patriarchal order for me. Yes the man is the head of the home (not the neck). Yet he cannot excercise this, one of the most sacred and potent of powers, without a woman. We excercise it most strongly when the man and woman are married. When they are committed to each other. When they have made solemn commitments to God.

All of us will be held accountable for how we excercise the power of life within us. A man and woman who make covenants with God and to each other has the benefit of His power to fulfill the raising of the children in a Christlike home. To pass on a legacy worthy of Him.

I know that I cannot live up to this standard. I must do my best and leave the rest to His grace. I must call upon Him before I can even have the hope of doing His work in my home.

There is so much joy in raising children. I say often that one of the wisest things God did for us is allow us to become parents. How better to give us perspective; to let us know how it is like for him? We are responsible for children with their own wills. We can learn how to lead and inspire them to live according to the plan of happiness.

Now to attend to the little one in my lap.

LDS Ordinances

Here is a reference I found useful.

“Chapter 21: Ordinances,” Gospel Fundamentals, 115

Inspired Family Planning

Today I found an "I Have a Question" article from the Aug 1979 Ensign. The question was "Is it our understanding that we are to propagate children as long and as frequently as the human body will permit? Is there not any kind of 'gospel family-planning,' for lack of a better way to say it?"

There is a part in it that is in line with a discussion we had in our ward in a fireside we had before our 2007 Ward Conference. The stake presidency was there and was taking questions about church policy. They were answering them from the General Handbook of Instruction. It is funny how many times the answer was, pray about it together.

I recall a President of the Church, now deceased, who visited his daughter in the hospital following a miscarriage.
She was the mother of eight children and was in her early forties. She asked, "Father, may I quit now?" His response was, "Don't ask me. That decision is between you, your husband, and your Father in Heaven. If you two can face him with a good conscience and can say you have done the best you could, that you have really tried, then you may quit. But, that is between you and him. I have enough problems of my own to talk over with him when we meet!" So it is clear to me that the decisions regarding our children, when to have them, their number, and all related matters and questions can only be made after real discussion between the marriage partners and after prayer.
(Homer Ellsworth "I Have a Question," Ensign, Aug 1979, 23–25)

Keep in mind that the "I Have a Question" articles always has had a disclaimer at the top like "Questions of general gospel interest answered for guidance, not as official statements of Church policy." That being said, these sources have been a welcome confirmation to me as to the principles behind inspired family planning.

The short answer I give to people when they ask "Are you going to have more?" is "We'll see". It is something to be considered carefully, "after real discussion between the marriage partners and after prayer".

My wife has been much more inspired as we have considered "Do we have more?" I always wanted a lot of children. Yet when the time came, almost always there was some consideration keeping me from wanting to. Can I provide for them physically, emotionally, etc.? I remember one such time when my wife felt like it was time to stop preventing. I said that I would go pray about it. I went in the other room to kneel. I was not there 1 or 2 minutes when I felt foolish. I knew the answer was that there were more to come for our family. My selfish reservations did not stack up.

The Lord does not want us to run faster than we have strength. Yet in more than one passage, this counsel is followed by "be diligent" (Mosiah 4:27, D&C 10:4). The Lord lives in a state of unending happiness. As we trust in Him and seek His counsel, as we seek answers to difficult questions, seeking answers with the determination to follow, we will be led to the kind of happiness He enjoys.

- Jul 2015

We claim the privilege of choosing the number of children we have according the dictates of our own conscience and allow all parents the same privilege let them have or not have who they may.

which easily doth beset me

God does not look upon sin with the least degree of allowance. I must repent of all my sins to return to Him. In the words of President Hinckley, I must do my best to follow Jesus. That means to do my best in each moment of my life. I will admit, I do not always do my best. Sometimes I am willful, rebellious and even downright belligerent.

Where does that place me? Am I to be damned? Perhaps if I continue down that path of rebellion. To insist that God do things on my timetable. To throw a fit when things don't turn out the way I want.

There is joy in salvation of God. Salvation that occurs right now. The one that immediately comes to me as I turn my heart to Him. By my own free will, surrender anything that keeps me from communion with Him. Give up anything that would keep me from benefiting from living a life as He would.

How does this transformation take place? Immediately, yes, there are moments when I feel contrition. I feel His love as I recommit to do better. I am empowered by his Grace. He says to me, "Go and sin no more". Then there is the everyday fulfilling of my promise. Did I do a little better today than yesterday? Do I have the integrity to admit when I messed up to those involved? How long do I take to repent? Is it a matter of seconds, minutes, days, decades?

Sometimes I get overwhelmed. I feel there is too much to do. I cannot fulfill all my commitments. I do best at these times to remember to do something good. If I cannot do everything, do something. Make myself busy keeping my word.

As I listened to Alma 7, I thought about these things.

Yea, I say unto you come and fear not, and lay aside every sin, which easily doth beset you, which doth bind you down to destruction, yea, come and go forth, and show unto your God that ye are willing to repent of your sins and enter into a covenant with him to keep his commandments, and witness it unto him this day by going into the waters of baptism

The phrase "which doth easily beset" caught in my mind. I remembered that I need to prioritize my repentance. Work on the things that most easily trip me up. Improve on those things that help me to improve in other things. Things such as communion in prayer. Searching the scriptures. Having a meaningful sacrament. Improving my relationships with my wife and children.

When I am feeling down, it gives me hope when I think of doing one thing. One thing to improve. One thing to be busy about. I often think of the scripture at D&C 123:17. To cheerfully do.

Therefore, dearly beloved brethren, let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance to see the salvation of God and for his arm to be revealed

When I do my best, I feel confident that the Lord will protect me spiritually. If need be, legions of angels are at my need to bear me up. To strengthen me as the Savior was in Gethsemane. He asked for and received the help he needed. Elisha asked the Lord to open the eyes of his servant so he might see the physical protection the Lord provided 1 Kings 6:15-17.

15 And when the servant of the man of God was risen early, and gone forth, behold, an host compassed the city both with horses and chariots. And his servant said unto him, Alas, my master! how shall we do?

16 And he answered, Fear not: for they that be with us are more than they that be with them.

17 And Elisha prayed, and said, Lord, I pray thee, open his eyes, that he may see. And the Lord opened the eyes of the young man; and he saw: and, behold, the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire round about Elisha.

"sin wickedly cloaked in the robes of piety"

I relate too well to Albert in The Holy Secret. It hit me when I read the phrase, "sin wickedly cloaked in the robes of piety" (p 134). He said it when he pushed too far teaching the gospel of Jesus Christ. He appropriately prayed silently, immediately, "Help me to love him, Father - to love him more than knowledge". To love your (child, student, anyone you happen to be talking to when on the sacred ground of repentance and forgiveness) more than being the sage.

James Ferrell says it again succinctly, "No heartache will be soothed by one who merely spouts doctrine at another's pain, even if the doctrine is true". He has a footnote there to D&C 50:17-18, "Verily I say unto you, he that is ordained of me and sent forth to preach the word of truth by the Comforter, in the Spirit of truth, doth he preach it by the Spirit of truth or some other way? And if it be by some other way it is not of God" (emphasis added).

It has been pointed out to me recently that how I communicate is more important than the words sometimes. Am I speaking to ensure they know I am right? Do I seek to understand before seeking to be understood? Do I admit my fault in the argument we had? Being "right" about a doctrine is trumped by my approach, if I come in with six shooters blazing. Better to be kind. Try to encourage contrition in the speaker and the hearer. Acknowledge my position as beggar before the Lord. Both become hearers of the Spirit. Both are edified and rejoice because of the grace God offers us. The grace we immediately feel because our wills are given to Him. We glory in the healing we feel.

Jesus has cleaned up a lot of messes after me

In the last 18 hours one of my kids has had some bowel issues. Not fun to clean up. Something occurred to me during the first episode. Jesus has cleaned up a lot of messes after me. Even when I did my best to help, I just spread the mess around.

It was much easier to deal with the yuck with this in mind.

Creating a Gospel-Sharing Home

I already got a response to my last posting. She said she had been thinking of sharing the (LDS) gospel to some relatives. I then thought of this from Elder Ballard's Creating a Gospel-Sharing Home talk, "Our love for the Lord and appreciation for the Restoration of the gospel are all the motivation we need to share what gives us much joy and happiness" mp3

The best thing I can do the share the gospel is share the joy it brings my life. I do not have to hold back a spiritual experience just because the person I am talking to is not a Latter-Day Christian. Certainly, I will not cast pearls before those who will mock me. There are many good people in my life that are not Mormon.

I can enrich my own life and relationships by being willing to be more vulnerable to my kind neighbors. It is best if I truly abandon a salesman like motive when I share. Share for sharing sake. More importantly, listen with the idea to understand. Trust salvation to God.

Today I invite you to relax and set aside your concerns and focus instead on your love for the Lord, your testimony of His eternal reality, and your gratitude for all He has done for you. If you are truly motivated by love and testimony and gratitude, you will quite naturally do all that you can to assist the Lord in “[bringing] to pass the immortality and eternal life” (Moses 1:39) of our Father’s children. In fact, it would be impossible to keep you from doing it.

Convicted and Civil

Last night I attended "A Conversation Between a Mormon & an Evangelical" a public lecture with Dr. Robert L. Millet and Rev. Gregory C. V. Johnson at the Tempe Institute of Religion at ASU.

I cannot express how much I enjoyed it. They spoke of "convicted civility" a phrase they got from Richard J. Mouw. It means that I can retain the convictions of my beliefs and allow a close friend of mine to keep his and yet we can have a rich and rewarding relationship. Where the goal is not conversion but understanding. Not score keeping but increased curiosity. It reminds me of a phrase from Jeffrey R. Holland's recent talk “My Words . . . Never Cease” where he stated the LDS claim that we are Christians "respectfully but resolutely". I would have no problem with an evangelical sharing his beliefs with me. Done respectfully yet passionately.

How is this possible? I saw in this 2 hour presentation good-natured joking and teasing between the two of them. They said that their relationship was based on many lunches. Bro Millet said you can say that our relationship is founded on a lot of salad. Rev Johnson then said "and a little bit of pasta in the case of Bob".

By their own description, this was not a Rodney King "Can't we just all get along" kind of relationship. They asked each other hard questions. Bro Millet related a story of another time they shared this presentation. A person asked Bro Millet, "Don't Mormons believe in a different Jesus than we do?" Bro Millet had just finished writing a book on this theme. He was so full of ideas yet his tongue didn't move. In the pause his friend Rev. Johnson said, "Can I take this?" Bro Millet happily conceded. "I wonder if you might change how you ask that question. What if you asked instead 'What do you believe about Jesus?'" He went on to say how the first question is a conversation stopper. Then second a conversation starter.

When they passed out 4x5 cards I was so excited. I thought, "what can I ask these guys?" I wrote. "Rev. Johnson, would you introduce me to someone (an evangelical) in the northwest Phoenix Valley who would like to have lunch with me?" I grew up in the Phoenix area. In high school I had some very good evangelical friends. I was very saddened when I felt my relationship with them had to stop because we could not bridge the gap in our theology. They were very good people. I would expect they still are.

Bro Millet shared a story at the end where he read Just As I Am, Billy Graham's autobiography. At the end he was emotionally moved. He expressed to his wife his conviction that God had used Rev Graham to move His work forward on earth. He quoted Elder Orson F. Whitney of the quorum of the twelve apostles who spoke in the April 1928 General Conference, "God is using more than one people for the accomplishment of His great and marvelous work. The Latter-day Saints cannot do it all. It is too vast, too arduous for any one people. … They are our partners in a certain sense."

This reminded me of my good evangelical friends in high school. There is no doubt for me that God moved in their lives. They were completely committed to moral chastity among many in the school who would have persuaded them otherwise. They were kind. They looked for ways to uplift others. Their works are the fruit. They demonstrated to me the Grace of God they had received.

Here is a YouTube video, "Standing Together: Is Anybody Listening?" with both Reverend Johnson and Brother Millet. I recommend it. Here is a summary about what is different about the "Faith Dialogue" Greg Johnson wants to foster. Here is an article written by Robert L. Millet. He tells a story that I think is helpful.

On this particular night, the first question asked by someone in the audience was on DNA and the Book of Mormon. I made a brief comment and indicated that a more detailed (and informed) response would be forthcoming in a journal article from a BYU biologist. There were many hands in the air at this point. I called on a woman close to the front of the church. Her question was, "How do you deal with the Adam-God doctrine?"

I responded, "Thank you for that question. It gives me an opportunity to explain a principle early in our exchange that will lay the foundation for other things to be said." I took a few moments to address the questions, "What is our doctrine? What do we teach today?" I indicated that if some teaching or idea was not in the standard works, not among official declarations or proclamations, was not taught currently by living apostles or prophets in general conference or other official gatherings, or was not in the general handbooks or official curriculum of the Church, it is probably not a part of the doctrine or teachings of the Church.

I was surprised when my pastor friend then said to the group: "Are you listening to Bob? Do you hear what he is saying? This is important! It's time for us to stop criticizing Latter-day Saints on matters they don't even teach today." At this point in the meeting, two things happened: first, the number of hands went down, and second, the tone of the meeting changed quite dramatically. The questions were not baiting or challenging ones but rather were efforts to clarify. For example, the last question asked was by a middle-aged man: "I for one would like to thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for what you have done here tonight. This thrills my soul. I think this is what Jesus would do. I have lived in Utah for many years, and I have many LDS friends. We get along okay; we don't fight and quarrel over religious matters. But we really don't talk with one another about the things that matter most to us—that is, our faith. I don't plan to become a Latter-day Saint, and I'm certain my Mormon friends don't plan to become Evangelical, but I would like to find more effective ways to talk heart to heart. Could you two make a few suggestions on how we can deepen and sweeten our relationships with our LDS neighbors?"

At that point, I sensed that we had somehow gotten through to some of the audience. Richard Mouw, one of my Evangelical friends,has suggested the need for "convicted civility," the challenge to be true to our own faith and not compromise one whit of our doctrine and way of life, and at the same time strive to better understand and respect our neighbors who are of another religious persuasion.

I remember a neighbor of mine. One who just a few weeks ago politely said they are not interested in learning more about the LDS church. I think I will print out a copy of this and give it to him. What a radical idea! Friends who only try to understand, to be neighborly. Who leave the converting to God.

Now a final note to the friend of Greg Johnson. The one who he said he would introduce me to. I am looking forward to lunch :)

Update Sep 2014

Here is an example of one of their conversations from June 13th, 2012. "Talking Past Each Other"